Obviously “Asian” is a wide brief as you’ve noted, but even within that, there’s a heavy dependency on the amount of chilli heat likely to be involved in the food. Punjabi is often not super hot, but can have some hot dishes.
Assuming the intention would be to balance the heat rather than reinforce it, you’ve more options when the spice level is lower. To balance heat, wines with one or more of higher acidity, residual sugar, fruit-forwardness (is that a word?), lower tannins and lower alcohol helps.
For reds with Indian food, I’d think about Carménère, Pinot Noir (probably something fruity and New World rather than Burgundy, maybe Central Otago), or even Rioja with some bottle age. I recently was surprised how well a new world Syrah-Viognier blend worked. Of course if they want to reinforce heat, a big young tannic red will do the trick…
Whites are a bit easier, obvious answer with Indian food is Riesling, probably Kabinett level sweetness. If the food isn’t too hot, Loire Sauvignon Blanc works surprisingly well, even though it’s dry. Alsace Pinot Gris can also be good if you want more aromatics. Some people like Gewürztraminer with Indian, personally I think it’s better with the sharper heat of Thai food.
Viognier can also work with milder/creamier dishes, but it’s a bit unpredictable with the high alcohol and low acidity. I’d put Pinotage in the same “unpredictable” category for reds, it can work or not IME.
The grapes I’ve mentioned are probably a bit mainstream for your taste, but you could perhaps apply the acidity, sugar, tannin etc “rules” to your more expansive grape knowledge. As always, these are subjective broad guidelines, what the drinker likes is more important, though chilli will tend to overpower delicate (and some not so delicate) dry whites.
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